For those of you who don't know me personally, I was married for over three years to Eve.
She was the most creative, imaginative, intelligent, and wonderfully talented
woman that I have ever known. On October 29th of 2000, however, Eve took her
I had considered several times to put in writing my memories of my life
with Eve. Putting memories down in writing solidifies those jumbles of
thoughts that keep dancing around. Maybe I would have done this anyway,
but recently I have been specifically asked to describe Eve's life with me,
this from an old friend of hers who is having difficulty coming to grips
with her death. I can understand that. As he said, once Eve met me she
seemed to drop off the radar screen. So little word came from her during
the three years of our marriage, and then out-of-the-blue, they had word
of her suicide. For them, and for myself, I write this.
I don't want to get into much detail of Eve's life before she met me,
other than to say that it was harsh. No day went by without Eve being
tortured by what she had lived through. And few nights went by without
horrifying nightmares stealing away her only rest. Through High School and
College, Eve had many very good friends, many bad ones, and a few psychotic
ones. There were long lengths of time when she was living happily, but these
times always seemed to end abruptly. Eve lived in a nearly constant state of
desperation. Desperate for approval. Desperate for love. Desperate for
understanding. Desperate for money in College. Desperate for escape. And in
this world, being desperate is like dripping blood into a shark tank. Cowards
and those without honor see suffering as an opportunity.