Tuesday, July Twentieth
new glasses

I have never realized, in all the years of living with Kristina, how absolutely loud she is. I didn't get to bed last night until maybe 3am or so. I expected to be able to make up my sleep in the morning.

Instead, I am awakened at 6am by the thunderous crash of the bathroom door slamming, Kristina stomping to and from her room and the bathroom, and the toilet seat clunking. I roll over, hoping that this was an isolated incident. No such luck. We next get the water running, the hairdryer going, stomp STOMP sTomp, crash, bang, clatter. Mind numbing.

Then there was a pause as she went downstairs to get breakfast. I rolled over again and snuggled back into bed, hoping I'd get to sleep before the next assault. Of course the cat chose that moment to start howling piteously in front of my door. I gave up my dreams of sleep and got dressed and went downstairs.

I did feel like I had sand in my eyes, and I felt really blah. But by the time I had something to eat and a mug of green tea I was feeling more awake. Ready for my trip into the city. Why? do you ask...oh yes, I forgot to say. I got an eye appointment and a contact lens appointment so I can finally get glasses I like and new contacts that don't feel like they are abrading my corneas.

We arrived a bit early for my appointment so we went next door to Lenscrafters to look at frames. I walked in and immediately was sucked in by one pair. I walked right over to them, put them on and asked Mum how they looked. She said they looked great. I decided to look around a teeny bit more incase there were some even more fabulous frames lurking, but all too soon I had to go for my appointment.

We arrive at the eye place and I fill out the forms. Unfortunately as it hadn't been 2 years since my last exam, OHIP won't cover it, so I had to pay for it, which was $70. I was admitted really quickly, had the exam (one eye didn't change, one changed a little bit) was teased gently for having such awful eyes, did some tests, and got a contact lens fitting. I then went back to Lenscrafters and looked at frames but nothing was as good as the first pair I saw. So I got those and then went back and got a 6 month supply of contacts. Then since we had an hour to kill while my glasses were being made, we went shopping.

I got a fabulous linen shirt at the Gap, which is the one you see me wearing in the picture. It was normally $68 and it was on sale for $20. I also got a pair of khakis there. That store is weird because as soon as you step in the door one of the sales people comes right up to you like a homing missile to greet you. I must say I have never had luck finding a pair of pants at the Gap until now. I got a 6 regular flat front and went in to try them on. I was accosted by another sales rep who wanted to know if everything was ok every 2 seconds. I decided that they looked good but they were a little short so I ended up getting a 6 long.

Their sizes must be odd because I've never been a 6 in my life. But I reallt like the pants. We also went to Eaton's and I got a white button up drawstring waist 3/4 length sleeve white cotton shirt. It was also massively on sale, normally $50 on sale for $20. So I have now bought all my new clothes for the year. Well, I do need another pair of jeans because I wore the butt out of one of my pairs on the dig. Good thing it happened right at the end because it would have been really embarrassing to walk around with my butt showing all day.

Later on in the evening we planned out what we're doing for the patio. We're using railroad ties now instead of stones for the retaining wall. So we're going to tackle that tomorrow. Also after supper for some reason Weener and I were looking at our report cards from school. You can really see how little I've changed. A common theme was that I don't deal with my emotions properly. I can see in Grade 5 when I went away to another school for French immersion my marks went from As in the first term to Cs in the second term. It was there I was called anti-social. I think it was that I hated the new environment I was thrust into. Mum said that I used to come home saying I hated everything about that school. I did manage to pull up my marks by third term but it was really interesting seeing those jagged patterns.

Something really interesting was my kindergarden and grade 1 reports. At the time, my mum was suffering from non-Hodgkins lymphoma that had spread to her spleen, liver and stomach. She had many major operations and chemotherapy from when we were 4 and 5. Our report cards seem to reflect this turmoil going on. Kristina especially seemed affected. I don't think we really knew what was going on, that our mum was very sick and might die but we did know something was wrong. Mum was telling me about how awful we were and how we'd misbehave almost on purpose like "you've set my perfect world upside down and this is the only way I know how to express my uncertainy and fears".

It was really interesting and it does explain a lot of what I was going through but didn't really know or didn't remember. But at the end I had to leave because my sister started talking about when she would bug the crap out of me, slapping me on the back of the head in the hall during grades 7/8 and high school, leaning all over me, stealing my things, pulling my pants down on the slide in grade 1, jumping off the teeter-totter when I was up on top so I'd fall, pushing me off the play structures, etc. All that resentment and frustration and anger I had felt towards her boiled up again, especially since she was talking about it like it was some big laugh. I just had to get out of there. I know I still don't know how to handle my emotions. Something school didn't really teach me I guess.

But anyhow, my glasses are the same shade of brown as my hair and I think of them as 'sexy librarian' glasses. They're sort of school-marmish but subtly sleek and sexy. They are so light and small and thin. I love them. I am so grateful that glasses are becoming 'stylish' to wear. There are actually choices of frames and colours enough to capture anyone's personality. Plus these high-index lenses means that people like me who have massive Coke-bottle glasses can actually look normal.